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New Year's Resolution... Hop on your path to AUTHENTIC LIVING

Writer's picture: Nicole HopeNicole Hope

As I sat down today to write up my New Year's resolutions or restarts or life upgrades...whatever you want to call them, I looked at the list and contemplated which parts were for ME and which goals were to appease the "I should" Gods.


If you don't know me, then you don't know that although I am far from perfect it is not from lack of trying. I mean years of trying to be "the best" and perfect version of myself. There's nothing wrong with that of course. I believe that we should show up every day as our best selves. This intent comes with the realization of course that our best self is going to look different every day. Sometimes my best self crushes it and sometimes my best self just gets through the day, hoping the next day will be better. Historically, however, my Best Self was the one that made others happy and the one that did all the things that "should" be done to be the proper person. The trouble with that approach is that it put me in a hole of never feeling like enough or being truly happy because I looked so deeply for outside validation that I lost track of who the real me was.


I lost track of my passions, my interests, my preferences and along with it my self love. I measured myself by relationships, career or academic success, competitive wins and beauty. Over the years I was wildly unhappy trying to appease others and never receiving what I thought was enough appreciation, attention or love because I never felt whole from it. It was like being on a treadmill chasing the carrot. You know you can never get the carrot on a treadmill, at least not based on comical drawings I have seen of that situation. And just like those comics I was never pleased enough with the results of my efforts and so I tried even harder to change who I was so my worth could be validated.


It was only about 5 years ago that I started to catch on to the reality of the situation. You truly have to love yourself. And to love yourself you have to honor who you are, exactly as you are and do what makes you feel good (aka...being in alignment). You can't mess up in this alignment approach because any detours serve as growth and learning so you can learn more about your authentic you. 5 years ago I finally picked up on that truth and started to listen and be guided by me. I began to do the things that made me happy, that brought me excitement and helped me to connect on a deeper level with myself.


I want to say it has been easy, but it hasn't. I want to say that it has felt amazing all along the way, but unfortunately no. I can attest that is has been insanely REWARDING. I have minimized my troubles with anxiety and depression. I have challenged myself to try new experiences where I have gained unending knowledge about my strengths, my abilities, my weaknesses, all of which were priceless lessons. Most importantly, I have created a community of people who I deeply adore, appreciate and connect with. And I don't have to adjust who I am to know that they love and appreciate me back. Now I wake up in the morning grateful to be me and recognize that being me is enough (yes I do give myself morning hugs just to say I love you self). Plus, most of the time, I am super jazzed for whatever adventure awaits that day, because it is A. OK to make life fun and passion filled.


So when you sit down tonight, tomorrow or the next day to write your New Year's Resolutions. Don't worry about adjusting your life to prove yourself to others or be someone you think other people will like. Create a list of shifts and changes that will help you learn about yourself and guide you towards being the healthiest, happiest, most authentic you.


If you have made it this far my resolutions in short are...

1. Say yes to new experiences.

2. Say yes to self-care

3. Say yes to giving and receiving love

4. Say yes to being in service to our world

5. Say yes to honoring my deepest self and her wisdom






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